(E)on degree...

One degree outside, and I'm still up.

I shouldn't.

Why? I keep wondering how it is gonna be life in the next 20 days, delightful changes appears rising on my daily life, and I've been loving it...

Tonight it's colder, and my heart still freeze of emotions. Fears coming rushing my head, thoughts paralyze my fingers to stop writing everything about you (don't tell anyone ok?).

Some friends I need them more than ever, it's hard to get TLC by mail, phone or chatting on internet. Love isn't all around, I say! Not tonight...

Emotions? Yes, the sad ones.

Darkness? No, I'm not gothic!

Hope? Every day (except tonight)

Dreams? More like nightmares (because I can't make them real, so I get anxious)


I know, everything that is really hard give us a different vision of live, give us more glory to achieve, but still not enough for me, just want more, and more and more and so badly that I can't stand it.

Love makes strange reactions on people.
I'll live a third of what I could live, because all the rocks on my way hurts me, all the thorns will lacerate my soul. Without believes or illusions, I keep fighting continuously for an ideal that doesn't exist and this constant excitement, desperate and hopeless, scatterbrained me the nerves and kills me.

My name is Tang. This is my story.